


Little Bit of Truth

by ambpersand



Category: Hunger Games Series - All Media Types, Hunger Games Trilogy - Suzanne Collins, The Hunger Games (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Rock Band, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-06
Updated: 2016-12-19
Packaged: 2018-09-03 03:20:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 12,611
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8694367
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ambpersand/pseuds/ambpersand
Summary: Katniss is just fine spending her nights at home, chatting away with the amazing guy she met online. After Jo schemes up a plan with her to get Annie to go out and see Finnick Odair's rock band, she's going to wish she had stayed in.Rated E for language and eventual smut.





	1. Part I

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so this is my first foray back into writing everlark fanfiction in over two and a half years, so go a little easy on me. This entire thing was inspired by the band You Me At Six, who I've quoted several times in this piece. 
> 
> I do not own the lyrics to any songs or any characters.

“Looks like you’ve got plans on Friday, Brainless. Clear your schedule,” Johanna tossed an envelope on the counter of the bar and sunk down on a stool opposite of Katniss. Her eyes glittered in the low hanging lights, and Katniss felt a kernel of unease wedge its way into her stomach. The last time Jo had included Katniss in her plans, she’d found herself on a 12 hour bar crawl that’d left her one step away from alcohol poisoning and nursing a three-day hangover.  
  
“Shouldn’t you have clocked in ten minutes ago?” Ignoring her, she pushed the envelope out of the way and continued with her duties, which at the moment included wiping down the bar top until the whiskey stains disappeared from its lacquered surface and _not_ paying attention to Johanna Mason and her dangerous ideas.  
  
Jo laughed, propping her chin on her hands and giving Katniss a toothy smile. “Don’t worry, this one doesn’t involve alcohol. Well, unless you want it to,” she paused, shrugging, “We will technically be at a bar.”  
  
“You want me to spend my night off from the bar- at another bar?” Katniss stopped wiping and raised an eyebrow. “I’m not taking you on another liquor tour of the city, Jo.”  
  
“No, no, no,” She pushed the envelope back towards Katniss, the plain white surface practically glowing against the mahogany in the dim bar lighting. It seemed ominous. “I got us tickets to a show. More specifically, _Finnick’s_ show. His band is in town.” Her eyebrows waggled and her smile grew wider. Suddenly, she looked a little too much like the Cheshire Cat to make Katniss feel comfortable.  
  
It took a moment for the information to process, but understanding dawned on Katniss. “Wait- _the_ Finnick? The one who professed his love for Annie over a voicemail?”  
  
“The one and only.”  
  
She couldn’t stop the laugh that bubbled up from her chest. “Jo, we can’t! That would be so mean… How would we even get Annie to go? You know she’d run screaming in the other direction.” Not that she was considering going along with Jo’s crackpot plan. Definitely not.  
  
“Listen, I don’t know about you, but I’m tired of seeing her mope around the apartment every weekend. She hasn’t even looked at another guy since he left her that message, but she’s too chicken shit to do anything about it,” Jo folded her arms over her chest. “It’s time for us to step in.”  
  
Katniss opened her mouth to respond, but paused. Jo was right. Annie was getting more and more depressed by the week. From what she’d gleaned, Annie had known Finnick throughout college, harboring a crush on him from the day she’d been assigned to lifeguard the men’s swim team practices. A casual friendship grew during their last two years, but they’d lost contact after graduation. Fast forward to six months ago, when they’d run into each other while visiting their alma mater for an alumni event, they’d reconnected and learned that while she waitressed and coached a kids swim team, he’d started a rock band and found fame. After drinking too much and falling into bed together, Annie had panicked and bolted as soon as she’d woken up the next morning, leaving Finnick passed out and completely unaware.  
  
Until three weeks later, when he’d managed to find her number through alumni records and left her a drunken and rambling message where he’d professed his love for her.  
  
Katniss had walked in on Annie sitting frozen in the living room that day, replaying the message on her cell phone over and over with a blank look on her face. She’d practically had to pry the phone from Annie’s white-knuckled grip.  
  
“It would never work,” Katniss sighed, tossing the rag into the sani-bucket under the counter.  
  
“I haven’t even gotten to the best part,” Jo huffed. “You underestimate me so much sometimes, you know that?”  
  
She raised an eyebrow and settled in with her elbows on the bar. “Please, Jo, dazzle me with your master plan.”  
  
“It’s a secret show.”  
  
Katniss straightened. “What?”  
  
Rolling her eyes, Jo continued. “As in, the general public doesn’t know about it- hence the ‘secret,’ Brainless. It was only announced to fan club members on their top-secret message forum.”  
  
“You’re joking with me. How would you even know about that?”  
  
Jo stretched and stood up from the stool, making her way around the bar before ducking under the counter at the end to join Katniss by the drink station. “I don’t know if it’s technically classified as stalking if you do all the research online, but you can learn a lot about a guy from the internet.”  
  
Katniss mulled the information over. Annie wouldn’t have any idea, and if it was a secret show, there wouldn’t be posters or marquees with his name splashed across them… It’d be fairly easy to lure her into thinking it was a girls night out…  
  
“So where’s the show?”  
  
Punching her credentials into the touchscreen computer behind the bar, Jo finally clocked in for her shift. “The Victory Lounge. It’s that swanky club uptown.”  
  
“I’m in,” Katniss didn’t wait to watch Jo dance around in triumph before heading to the back to restock their bottled beer for the night.  
  
As if on cue, she felt her cell phone buzz against her thigh through the thin material of her apron. After pulling it out, a vibrant photo filled the screen- oranges and pinks melting together into a beautiful sunset on a beach. Another chat message came through, replacing the image.  
  
“ _Thinking of you_ .” 

* * *

Shoving open the door to her apartment with her shoulder, Katniss sagged with relief to be the first one home. The three-bedroom apartment was eerily quiet as Jo and Annie were still covering their respective shifts at Sae’s Bar, and Katniss was due for two hours of alone time before either one would impede on her solitude.  
  
Taking on a third roommate had been an unexpected change to Katniss’ and Jo’s routine a year previous, but after a rent hike, their third bedroom had stopped being an underused office and started being leased to Annie, a new waitress at the bar where they both worked. Although they all got along, Katniss lived for the few hours she got each week without any noise or interruption.  
  
Katniss was thankful they didn’t have to wear a uniform at Sae’s Bar, but that meant her personal clothes ended up smelling like cheap vodka and greasy bar food after a shift. After a quick shower she settled into bed, clad in a pair of clean yoga pants and her favorite threadbare shirt. Her fingers deftly braided her damp hair while she waited for her laptop to boot up, it’s screen flickering on slowly.  
  
Fingers clicking against the keys she logged in to her Google Hangouts account, hoping to see a familiar name online.  
  
She didn’t even have time to read through her list of contacts before the message popped up.  
  
_Mellarky89: There you are._  
  
Katniss smiled to herself, biting her lower lip.  
  
_K.everest: my shift ran a little late tonight_  
  
_K.everest: what are you up to?_  
  
_Mellarky89: I just settled in at home, actually. I get the luxury of sleeping in my own bed for the next few weeks. Nothing feels better after such a long phase of nonstop travel. How was your shift?_  
  
Fingers hovering over the keyboard, she considered her response. She’d been talking to him for just over a year, but they’d agreed from day one that they wouldn’t ever exchange details that might give their identities away. She loved seeing glimpses into his day to day life, but where did she draw the line? Telling him about the drunks that always swatted at her ass while she served them their whiskey? He knew she worked in a restaurant, but not that she was a bartender. She knew that he was self-employed and traveled a lot for work that required him to keep odd hours, but that his true love was the arts. They talked about their passions, the weather, their hopes and dreams, the tiny things they did to pass the time while not working… everything and anything was on the table, except their names, jobs, and location.  
  
_K.everest: same as always… overcrowded and understaffed. looking forward to some time off this weekend_  
  
_Mellarky89: Any big plans?_  
  
_K.everest: actually, yes :)_  
  
_K.everest: J has a masterplan to get A set up with this guy…. She’s playing matchmaker this weekend and dragging me along as an accomplice. going to trick her into going to a club where he should be_  
  
In addition to agreeing not to share details that might give away their identity to each other, they’d agreed to refer to themselves, their friends, and their roommates only by first initial. Although they texted and chatted online every single day, Katniss was hesitant to let real-world names come into their conversations. Saying their names made everything feel too real, like it bled out past their online life together and into their outside lives where people knew.  
  
_Mellarky89: That… sounds like a pretty bad idea._  
  
_K.everest: im a little worried about it, myself… these things never go well in the movies, do they?_  
  
_Mellarky89: Never_  
  
_Mellarky89: You’ll never guess what I’m making right now._  
  
_K.everest: no! don’t tease me!_  
  
_Mellarky89: They’re in the oven as we speak. My entire place smells like Asiago and fresh baked bread._  
  
_K.everest: you’re the worst, P._  
  
_K.everest: the absolute worst._  
  
Mouth watering, she tried to imagine her own apartment smelling like cheese buns. They were her guilty pleasure from the grocery down the street, but he’d always claimed that his were better than any you could buy from a store.  
  
_Mellarky89: Don’t even try to deny it, you love me :P_  
  
Her heart stutter-stepped. She knew he was flirting, but the butterflies in her stomach made such a sudden appearance that she felt nauseous.  
  
_K.everest: do I though? Hmmmm_  
  
_Mellarky89: You wound me!_  
  
Truthfully, she wasn’t quite sure she didn’t love him. Aside from their agreement on identifying details, he knew everything about her. He’d provided patient comfort the night she drank too much and spilled the story of how her dad and younger sister died in a horrifying car wreck, leaving her mom a broken shell of a woman who could barely take care of herself. He’d listened when she ranted about her shitty ex-boyfriend who had broken up with her to date the Mayor’s daughter. He sent her pictures of his travels, giving her a glimpse of life outside her apartment and the bar. He chatted with her until the early hours of the morning, sending silly photos and memes to make her laugh until her sides hurt.

In return, he'd told her all about his passion for painting and baking, and how nothing felt better to him than creating something from nothing. She knew about his childhood, and how his mom was cold and abusive, but that his brothers made up for her lack of love with laughter and antics. He'd studied fine arts in school, and his gentle, humorous personality seemed to fit hers like a matching puzzle piece. He made up for where she lacked, and talking to him felt like how life _should_ be.

She couldn’t imagine not having him there, even if he was just some guy she met online.  
  
Sucking in a deep breath, she typed a few words out before hitting the send button and clenching her eyes shut. She couldn’t look.  
  
_K.everest: I’m so glad we met_  
  
The quiet _bing_ of his response made her peek at the screen.  
  
_Mellarky89: Does it technically count as “meeting” if we’ve never seen each other in person?_  
  
_Mellarky89: (just kidding)_  
  
_Mellarky89: I really should thank the guys for signing me up for CapitolMatch. I don’t know what I’d do without you, K._  
  
The butterflies were back, making her stomach feel weightless, like she was stuck on a rollercoaster ride that she both hated and never wanted to leave at the same time. They’d met in the most ridiculous way possible- an online dating website. She’d been drunk and lonely one night, stewing on the memories of Gale after he had dumped her, not realizing that the website would charge her $200 to take three hours’ worth of personality tests before giving her a list of potential matches.  
  
He, on the other hand, had been signed up as a joke by his friends who wanted to help him get laid since he'd refused all theirs other suggestions. What they didn’t realize was that the fee was non-refundable whether you finished completing your profile or not. Playing along with their joke, he had taken advantage of their “generosity.” Bent on proving to his friends that the dating website was a sham, he’d filled it out to prove a point that the website’s personality tests wouldn’t work.  
  
Neither of them had expected to get a 98% match.  
  
Before she could respond, another _bing_ signaled his next message.  
  
_Mellarky89: You know we’ve been talking for almost a year now… I wish I could see you. Sometimes I daydream about being able to put a face to the person who occupies so many of my thoughts..._

He’d never pushed, always agreeing that it was best to keep their identities private if or when they were ready to take it to the next step. Apparently, it was time.  
  
Katniss was pretty sure her heart was lodged in her throat, and that she may or may not be on the verge of a heart attack.  
  
_K.everest: really? Now?_  
  
Neither of them had bothered putting profile photos up on CapitolMatch- they were matched so quickly that neither of them had time to finish completing the extraneous profile details. He’d messaged her out of curiosity once his friends had left the room, and their conversation had flourished instantly. Then came the agreement for privacy, and the opportunity was lost.  
  
_Mellarky89: I understand if you’re still hesitant._

Fingers poised over the keyboard, her heart continued to face. _What if he thinks I’m ugly? What if he’s some 40 year old man without any teeth?_ _Oh god…_

She was still lost in thought when another _bing_ broke her concentration.

_Mellarky89: I won’t push you, but if it helps, I’ll go first._

  
The tightness in her chest eased slightly. This, she could work with. His patience would always coax her back from the edge of panic. Quickly, she weighed her options. If he sent a photo first, she had the upper hand. She had options if he sent a photo of some snaggletoothed, pot-bellied hillbilly. Options that included never logging back on again.

But what if he wasn’t? What if he was handsome and perfect and completely out of her league? She knew he was around the same age as her, they’d matched their age range on CapitolMatch. If that were the case, then she would have to send him a photo in return.

Or run. She could definitely still run. 

_K.everest: Okay. But you have to go first._

Fingers shaking, she held her breath until her lungs began to burn. Time was ticking by slowly, and he had yet to respond.

Suddenly, a photo popped up on the screen. It was minimized into a thumbnail, but she could see the general figure of a man in front of a mirror, phone held up in one hand to take a selfie. With a deep breath, she clicked to enlarge it.

Gasping so hard she choked, Katniss leaned forward to cough into her clenched fist. No, he wasn’t handsome.

He was _stunning._ Devastatingly so.

She’d imagined a thousand different faces for him over the last year. She’d imagined he was tall and dark, his skin a smoky olive tone just like hers. She’d imagined him pale and freckled, with glasses and fiery red hair. She’d imagined him with a man-bun, a close-cropped military buzzcut, and a mess of curls. She’d imagined him tall, short, and in between.

Her imagination had nothing on reality.

Tousled blonde waves fell on his forehead half hazardly, framing his bright blue eyes. They focused on the phone in his hand, and a pink tinge shaded the tips of his ears as if he was nervous. His strong jawline was emphasised with the tilt of his head, and he chewed lightly on his bottom lip. A white t-shirt was stretched across his chest, thin enough that she could see the shadows of his abs peeking through. His dark washed jeans were slung low on his hips, providing her with a glimpse of his _very_ flat stomach.

And then there were the _tattoos._ Color bled along the length of his right arm, a wash of strokes and images that bled into one another like watercolor. They were bright but abstract, not clearly making any tangible details as they flowed up and down his skin. More dark lines etched into his chest were faint enough through the material of his shirt, and they crawled up past his collar bone until they reached just above the neckline of his t-shirt. More tattoos covered the outside of his left bicep, but they were blocked by his hand holding the phone.

He stood in front of the mirror in what she had to assume to be his bathroom. It was spotless and expensive-looking, the subway tiles gleaming in the light and the sink had no extra bottles or toiletries on it, save for a single toothbrush in it’s holder and a half-used tube of toothpaste.

_Mellarky89: Are you still there? Please tell me that I didn’t scare you off with my hideous appearance._

Katniss glanced down at the clock in the corner of her screen. She’d been staring at the photo for several minutes, completely unable to look away.

How was she supposed to top that? How could she send him _anything_ that compared? Panic set back in, the nerves slamming back into her with the force of a freight train.

_Mellarky89: I promise there’s nothing you can do to disappoint me, K. I’ll be waiting here until you’re ready._

He always had a way of knowing. Even being physically apart, he could interpret her silences and say just the right thing.

_K.everest: that’s not fair_

_Mellarky89: :)_

_K.everest: had I known we were taking selfies tonight, I would have done it before I showered and dressed in my ratty sweats_

_Mellarky89: You can send me anything you want. Even if it’s an outdated, blurry photo of you from high school. You don't even have to send it tonight, if you don't want to. Whenever you feel ready._

That gave her an idea. She had a photo on her computer that Annie had taken at their last girl’s night, when Jo had suckered her into a Friday night bar-hop. It was only a few months old, and Annie had caught her laughing at one of Jo’s foul-mouthed commentaries. It had been springtime, and while Jo had drug them outside for a cigarette, Katniss had leaned against the brick wall of the bar to wait for her to finish. Long hair braided to the side and a black leather jacket over her tank top, her arms were crossed over her chest as she leaned forward, eyes crinkled in laughter.

Annie had sent it to her that night with a simple “You should have it.”

Dragging the photo from her desktop into the chat window, she released it in the text field before taking a deep breath. It sent automatically, saving her the opportunity from chickening out and changing her mind.

It didn’t seem like she could get any more nervous than before, but waiting for his response became torture. After a minute of silence, she began to type, but a message interrupted her.

_Mellarky89: I think I just forgot how to breathe._

_Mellarky89: You are the most gorgeous thing I have ever seen._

Relief washed through her, warm and calming. As soon as it hit, she felt a blush creep up her neck and bleed into her cheeks.

* * *

 

“I don’t know why I have to get all dressed up if we’re just going to some bar, Jo,” Annie protested as Jo pushed her back down the hall towards her bedroom.

“It’s not just a bar- its a fancy club _with_ a bar. Fancy with a capital F. Now go put on that tight little black number I know is in the back of your closet.”

Katniss was sprawled out on the couch, watching Jo between distracted glances. Her phone was resting in her lap, P’s photo on the dim screen.

She couldn’t stop looking at him.

It had been two nights since they’d finally seen one another, and she couldn’t resist the desire to look at his photo every few hours. And when she did, giddiness bubbled up in her chest like helium. Every time she looked at it, she noticed something new.

Like the way his fingers looked thick and calloused wrapped around his phone, or how the muscles in his arms were the perfect balance between slim and bulky. His shoulders were so broad, tapering down into slim hips that filled out his jeans perfectly. Hair so perfectly tousled and wavy it looked like he’d spent hours running his hands through it, pushing it back from his forehead.

God, he looked like he _smelled_ delicious.

An impatient huff echoed from the back bedroom, followed closely by a muffled “How do you even know what’s in my closet?”

Jo shrugged, even though Annie couldn’t see it, and joined Katniss on the couch. “Don’t ask questions you don’t want the answer for, babe,” she shouted back at her.  Leaning over, she moved her legs until she was laying in the opposite direction.

“How’s your online loverboy?”

Katniss clamped her hand down on top of her phone and tried to tamp down the blush that she could feel heating her ears. “What?”

“You haven’t stopped staring at your phone in days. What’s happened? Did he send you a photo of his dick? Can I see it?” She quirked her eyebrow up, shooting Katniss a smirk.

Rolling her eyes, Katniss shoved her cellphone into her pocket. “You’re awful, do you know that?”

Before she could answer, Annie waltzed back into the living room, chin held high. “How come I have to wear this and Katniss gets to wear jeans?” She sent a pointed look towards Katniss’ faded skinny jeans.

“Because I could never pull off a dress like that,” Katniss answered with an honest smile. It was true, Annie’s black bandage dress showed off her body like no one else could dream of. Petite and curvy in all the right places, it molded to her like a second skin.

She crossed her arms, frowning. “Doesn’t matter. You two don’t get to schlub around beside me in jeans all night if I have to wear this monstrosity,” pulling at the hem of the dress, her face twisted into an uncomfortable scowl.

Jo sighed, giving in and sending Katniss a rueful smile. “You heard the woman. Last one to get changed has to pay for parking.”

Twenty minutes later, Jo was ushering them out the door with an unusual amount of urgency.

“What’s the hurry?” Eyebrows furrowed, Annie shrugged on her purse as Jo lead the way down the hall. Katniss followed suit, trying to pick off the remaining laundry lint from her green shift dress before they reached the elevator. She barely had time to get her hair brushed out from it’s braid and tamed before Jo had been shouting at her to “get her ass in gear.”

“We’ve got to beat the crowds. I heard this place is usually packed on Friday nights. And I don’t know about you ladies, but I don’t want to have to fight off a drunk pack of dudes just to get a decent table.”

Katniss snorted. It was a decent excuse, but she knew better. The show was slated to start in a half an hour, and they had to get Annie in the crowd at the perfect time. Too soon and she would realize what was happening, too late and she would see Finnick from the back of the club and be able to bolt.

Jo had thought it all through. She knew that the club had curtains in front of their stage that they held closed while the bands set up, pulling them open until the show started. They had to get Annie close enough to the stage just before the band came on, that way she’d be trapped by the crowds and unable to run away when the curtains opened and she saw Finnick.

It was awful and evil and a little bit perfect.

Had Katniss not known that Annie was still pining, she wouldn’t have agreed to help. Annie would be monumentally pissed, but she saw the way she didn’t even bother looking at the attractive guys that came into the bar and smiled her way. Or how she would get a little bit hopeful every time her phone rang, but her face would always fall when she realized it wasn’t him. Last, and most importantly, Katniss had asked her about it the day before, when they were both alone in the bar, prepping for their Thursday night shift.

_“Do you ever wish you’d called him back, Annie?”_

_She was silent for several long moments. “It doesn’t really matter much now, does it?”_

Katniss had understood her unspoken meaning. It didn’t matter now, since she’d been too scared to do anything. Then, time had trickled by until she thought it was too late and missed her chance.

* * *

 

Greeted by a line snaking around the building when they arrived, Katniss felt disappointment begin to brew in the bottom of her stomach.

“We’re never going to get in,” Annie’s words echoed her own thoughts.

Jo laughed, “O’ ye of little faith, I’m almost wounded that you think so little of my skills.”

Following her as she surpassed the line and marched up to the security guard at the entrance, Katniss saw Jo’s hand snake into her purse to pull out the white envelope of tickets she’d bought earlier in the week. Realizing what was about to happen, Katniss panicked and glanced at Annie. If she saw, she’d immediately be suspicious.

“Oh my god, isn’t that Cato Jennings? ” She pointed behind Annie’s shoulder to a random man across the street, causing her to turn around and look away from where Jo was currently providing the security guard with their tickets to the concert. Cato had been a line order cook at Sae’s who’d been fired several months earlier for snorting cocaine in the bathrooms while on shift.

Annie squinted, struggling to see in the dark. “Uh, I didn’t see him. I guess it could have been?” Confusion shaded her face.

“Ladies!” Jo barked, “Quit dicking around over there and come get your hand stamped. We don’t have all day!”

Katniss looked up in time to see Jo shoot her a quick wink, and she knew she’d bought her enough time with the crappy distraction. Following Annie, the security guard stamped the top of her hand, leaving behind the stencil of a red star. “Enjoy the show,” his baritone voice rumbled as they filed their way inside.

“Show?” Annie asked, raising her voice over the growing echo of voices inside the club.

“Guess there’s a concert going tonight. I didn’t pay that security guard twice the cover charge for nothing, so we’re going to ride this one out!”

Shaking her head, Annie laughed. “Whatever you say, Jo,” She shouted.

“Let’s get a spot up close to the stage… Maybe they’ll be good!” Katniss knew she couldn’t let Jo be the only one pushing Annie or else it might become too obvious. They were used to Jo being the pushy one, but Annie might start asking questions if it looked like she was up to something.

“Are you sure?” Annie asked, glancing back as Katniss set her hands on her shoulders, guiding her through the crowd.

“It’ll be fun!” Katniss forced a smile. It would be loud, crowded, and sweaty. Not exactly fun, but this was for Annie, not her.

It took them several minutes, but thanks to Jo throwing sharp elbows and murderous looks at the people they passed by, the crowd parted enough to let them through until they reached a semi-open spot near the front of the stage. There were a few rows of people sandwiched in between Katniss and the front barricade, but it was right in front of center stage.

“God, this place is packed!” The low hum of noise around them made it difficult to hear Annie’s shout, but Katniss nodded in agreement.

“They must be pretty popular if all these people came to see them!” Jo chimed in, situating her body behind and to the right of Annie, standing just behind her shoulder. Blocking her escape, no doubt. Katniss took the hint and did the same on the other side, pressing her hand into Annie’s shoulders.

“You’re the shortest one of us, you should stand in front so you can see better!” Katniss said, leaning closer to her ear so she didn’t have to shout. Annie nodded in agreement, too busy trying to see around the crowd to question it.

Pulling out her phone, she was greeted by a blank screen. No service. With a sigh she shoved it back into her purse, wishing she’d sent P a message before coming inside. Even though he’d mentioned he was working tonight, she always tried to send him a message before in case they didn't have time to catch up later on in the evening.

After a few minutes of idle chat, the house lights faded dim, and the crowd immediately went crazy. Whistles and shrill screams surrounded them as fans pressed forward, inching to get closer to the stage. The entire room went black in a split second, and Katniss' arm shot out to grab hold of Annie, desperate not to lose track of her in the crowd. Plunged into the inky darkness so suddenly, she could feel her heart beginning to pound.

Softly, a drum beat began, echoing the hammering rhythm in her chest. It grew steadily, building and building until, with a crash of symbols, two different guitar melodies and a thumping bass line joined. The sound was unusually catchy, the deep bass guitar laying down a swinging rhythm that had Katniss rocking her head along with the crowd.

Within seconds of the start, the curtains opened, revealing the wide stage and a series of back lights, framing the musicians as silhouetted figures in the dark.

 _“Wait up for my call_  
_Cause I want it all_  
_I've chased for so long_ _  
My time has come”_

A voice like liquid sex echoed through the venue, warm and husky in a way that scattered goosebumps across her skin. The crowd grew even more rowdy, pushing and pulsing as fans began to dance and jump around. It was hard to hear the band over the cacophony of noise, but his voice continued to filter through.

 _“I'll come loud_  
_And come clear_  
_That look in your eyes_  
_Says you're mine on this day_  
_The wrong time, the wrong place_ _  
To say this to your face”_

Katniss felt Annie tense up beside her, but she was too focused on trying to see the singer through the darkness. He was less than ten feet in front of her, but the backlight was too extreme. All she could make out was the outline of broad shoulders and unruly hair, wild as he sung into the microphone and frantically strummed on his guitar.

 _“But I want you when I need you_ _  
_ _Every single night and day”_

Erupting with a flash, the stage lights flew around the venue, bathing the band in a swirl of color and light. Disoriented, Katniss squinted to see, but once her eyes adjusted, she froze.

She was barely aware of Annie turning around to glare at them both with daggers in her eyes. “How could you do something like this?”

Her voice might as well have been a whisper in the storm of noise that was raging around them, but Katniss couldn’t answer.

She couldn’t move.

She couldn’t breathe.

She couldn’t think.

Because the man on the stage, the man with the voice like whiskey and sex and everything she’d ever dreamed of, wasn’t just some stranger.

It was P.

 


	2. Part II

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did I say this would be split into 2 parts? I definitely meant 3. 
> 
> This chapter is dedicated as a slightly belated Happy Birthday for @andthisisthewonder! 
> 
> Thank you so so much to everyone who liked, commented, and sent messages about this piece. I'm so glad you all like it!

Trapped between the mass of pulsing bodies that surrounded her, she couldn’t tear her gaze away from him. She wanted to stay, she wanted to run, she wanted to get close and disappear all at once. 

He performed with his entire body. His hips moved in time with his guitar, playing with a fervor that made her skin feel hot just from watching. Standing close to the microphone, he sang into it with what seemed like every ounce of energy he had, his face expressive as he belted out the lyrics. His eyes, those vibrant blue irises that she’d been staring at for days, swept out across the crowd before glancing back at his bandmates and grinning widely between the lyrics of their song.

Katniss felt the breath she’d been holding push out of her lungs in a rush, making her head feel like she was suddenly off kilter and needed to fight for her balance. His lopsided smile was so perfect it was almost painful. Before she could wither into the darkness of the crowd, he began to sing again.

_“Keep your cool  
You hold the cards, you make the rules_

_And I want you when I need you  
Every single night and day_

_The right time, the right place  
To say this to your..._

_Cause I want you when I need you  
Every single night and day”_

The crowd roared as the song faded out, and he leaned forward to rest his hand on the microphone. His guitar pick was still stuck between his fingers, and his neck glistened with a fine sheen of sweat. Breathing heavy, his black t-shirt was beginning to stick to his chest.

_Oh dear god._

It was only then that Katniss noticed Jo beside her, trying to console Annie as she buried her face into her palms. 

Well now she felt like an ass. 

“Annie, babe, we swear we were only trying to help,” Jo had a rare, but soft, look of concern on her face as she tried to pat Annie’s shoulder in solace. “We didn’t mean to make you upset. We thought you’d be-”

Lifting her head from her hands, Annie bared her teeth in anger. “You better not say a god damn thing Jo unless you want me to strangle you in your sleep. This is _not_ okay.” 

Katniss took a hesitant step back, but couldn’t go far given the limited space in the crowd. She’d seen Annie happy, sad, and sarcastic, but never furious. 

Glancing over, Jo sent Katniss a look that pleaded for help. 

“Uh,” Katniss had to clear her suddenly too-dry throat. “We wouldn’t have brought you if we didn’t think you still cared, Annie.”

Annie’s scowl lessened, but it morphed into a frown as she looked back towards the stage. It was only then that Katniss was able to take a good look at Finnick. 

_Holy hell_. He was like Adonis reincarnate, with his bronze hair and green eyes twinkling in the bright lights. Slinking around the stage with his guitar slung over his chest like he owned the place, he was joking with the crowd as they roared for the next song to start. Lifting up the edge of his shirt to dry the sweat from his forehead, he flashed the audience a glimpse of his tan and chiseled abs. Katniss couldn’t help but roll her eyes- he knew what he was doing. The loud cheers and shouts turned to shrill screams as women went crazy, and he grinned before flashing an over exaggerated wink. 

“Well I guess if you’re that mad about it, we can leave…” Jo prompted, but Annie’s jaw had dropped open as she watched Finnick work his magic. Even she wasn’t immune, apparently. “Yeah, why don’t we just go?” She could barely contain the laughter in her voice as she pulled at Annie’s arm. 

“We’re not going anywhere,” Annie shrugged her off and crossed her arms over her chest as she replied, but her eyes never left Finnick. 

“If she wasn’t going to kill me already, she will soon,” leaning towards Katniss so Annie couldn’t overhear, Jo spoke quietly. 

Katniss’ eyes went wide, but Jo only quirked her eyebrows and smiled when she shot her a questioning look. 

“I want to see your hands in the air, Panem!” At the sound of _his_ voice echoing through the club, she couldn’t resist getting another look. Arms shot up all around her, hands waving in the air as they all cheered for the band. 

_God, he’s so much more gorgeous in person._

The thought made her stop. _He’s too gorgeous._

_Something’s not right._

She suddenly felt unsure, like there was something _off_ about it all. _What if…_

“I know we just got started, but we’re going to take it down here for a second,” he looked out at the crowd, grinning once more. “You guys might know a thing or two about falling in love, yeah?” 

The cheers from the crowd bounced off the walls, reverberating back into one loud buzz of noise. 

He pushed the unruly waves back from his forehead and his grin grew into a wide smile that lit up his entire face. “This is one of my favorite songs I’ve ever written, and it’s about a girl that I am totally, completely, head over heels in love with.”

A mix of “awws” and whistles were interspersed with the cheers of the crowd as Finnick began to strum out the melody, but it all faded to a dull murmur as Katniss took in his words.

He was in love. With a girl. 

A girl that obviously wasn’t her, or else she’d damn well know. 

_Oh my god…_  Katniss clapped her hand over her mouth to stifle the cry that fell from her lips. She could feel the telltale heat of bile rising in her throat, her dinner threatening to make a reappearance all over the floor of the club. 

_I’ve been catfished._

The man on stage wasn’t P at all.

And P was a _liar._

She couldn’t figure out if she wanted to faint or puke at the revelation. Pushing the hair from the back of her neck, she felt sweaty and overheated. _How could I be so stupid?_

Before she could think of all the reasons why she felt like an idiot, he started singing again, his voice stealing her breath completely. 

_“It was a cold night, we laid with each other just to stay warm_  
_Up all hours, not for the last time_  
_As it's a cold life, stay with each other one last time_  
_We could always run away some other night_

 _I knew the moment I met you_  
_I could never lose you_  
_I knew the moment I met you”_

Her throat felt tight and swollen, tears burning at the corners of her eyes. She looked around frantically, but she couldn’t get out of the crowd. She was trapped.

_“Don't you let me go this time_  
_Don't you let me go this time_  
_Don't go baby, it's time for us you know._  
_Don't go honey, this way we'll never know_  
_Don't go honey, this way we'll never know_

 _It was a cold night, the talk of forever kept us warm_  
_But even forever, doesn't last that long_  
_I say, say you'll never, say you'll never change”_

The tears were falling freely now, tracking down her cheeks as she cried silently. Wiping them away with angry fists, she glanced at Jo to make sure she hadn’t been seen. Luckily, she was too focused on Annie and the stage to notice. 

_“Say you'll never, say you'll never change_  
_Say you'll never, say you'll never change_  
_Say you'll never_

 _I knew the moment I met you_  
_I could never lose you_  
_I knew the moment I met you_

_ Don't you let me go this time  
Don't you let me go this time  _

_Don't go baby, it's time for us you know_  
_Don't go honey, this way we'll never know_  
_Don't go honey, this way we'll never know”_

He was singing into the microphone with his eyes closed, serenading the audience as if they were the girl he loved so much. She needed to look anywhere, at anything but him. Locking her eyes on the dark ceiling and focusing on the sound of blood pounding in hear ears, she began to shut it all out. 

She was going to be okay. This wasn’t the end of the world. She would live and move on. 

But not before she told P how she really felt about his lies. 

He continued singing, his words getting softer and softer as he repeated the remaining lyrics. When the music died out, she risked another glance at him. His teeth were digging into his bottom lip, mirroring the expression in the photo she had memorized. 

“Let’s get those house lights up! I want to see all of your beautiful faces!” He directed at the booth in the back of the club once the music had faded out, and the stage lights dimmed before the crowd was lit from above. 

As the crowd adjusted to the shift in light, they fell momentarily silent. Jo jumped at the opportunity, the only warning was the sudden breath she sucked in before making her move.

_“FINNICK I LOVE YOU!”_ She shouted in the loudest, most shrill voice Katniss had ever heard her muster. The men on stage immediately looked in their direction, searching for the girl behind the proclamation. 

Instantly mortified, Katniss swung her hair around her shoulder and looked to the side, grateful for the curtain to hide her face. Peeking out at them, she saw what Jo had done. She’d drawn Finnick’s attention to Annie. 

And it had worked. 

He was standing on stage, guitar in hand, mouth hanging open. After a moment, a smile began to stretch his lips. It was absolutely dazzling. 

“Well, well, well,” Finnick spoke into his own microphone, shaking his head. “It seems I have an admirer.” 

Still hidden behind her hair, Katniss looked out of the corner of her eye at _him._ “You mean another one?” He laughed, his hand shading his eyes as he squinted towards them. 

Her cheeks heated even more, but she didn’t want to be seen. It didn’t matter that this wasn’t P and he wouldn’t realize who she was. 

The humiliation burned too hot. Just having him look in her general direction was hard enough, let alone if he actually saw her. 

Finnick motioned to the security guards standing in front of the barricades, and they used quick hand signals as the next song started up. The house lights went back down and the stage lights lit up once more, and the guys began to strum at their instruments. After a moment Katniss pushed her hair out of her face, safe in the darkness once more. 

A hulking man in a bright yellow shirt marked with the word SECURITY pushed his way through the side of the crowd to get to the three of them. He spoke quickly with Jo, his face pressed down close to her ear before she nodded and grabbed the two of them. Leading them out of the crowd with one hand on each of their wrists, Katniss resisted the urge to dig her heels into the floor.

Where were they going?

On one hand, relief washed through her at getting away from the stage. She didn’t know how much more she could take.

On the other hand, wherever they were going couldn’t be good. Were they getting kicked out because Jo was heckling Finnick? 

Dread filled her limbs as they filed through the crowd after the security guard, dodging glares from other concert-goers. Instead of turning towards the front of the venue to lead them outside, he motioned with his head, indicating a door at the edge of the wall near the stage marked “EMPLOYEES ONLY.” 

“This way, ladies.” 

This was worse.

They were going backstage.

_I’d rather be kicked out._

* * *

 The door closed behind them, but the loud scrape of the metal was lost in the sea of noise from both the crowd and the band. Katniss, however, felt it in her chest- jolting her heart like a defibrillator. 

The hallway was dark and narrow, pushing them closer together as they neared the backstage area. Stopping abruptly, she leaned around Jo’s shoulders, trying to see who, or what, was ahead. They’d only come halfway, but a tall, lean figure stood in the way. The security guard pressed himself against the wall to motion them through, handing them off. “He’ll take you from here.”

Blue light emanated from a bare bulb in the wall, casting a strange glow against the man. Middle aged, with a wrinkled face and a bottle of Jack Daniels in his left hand, he sighed. “So you’re Annie.” 

It wasn’t a question, and his gaze was fixed on Annie. She squinted at him, but didn’t shy away. “How do you know my name?”

“Honey, who in this band doesn’t know your name? Maybe if Finnick would shut his mouth for more than a few minutes at a time, we might be able to forget. Now, follow me.” 

Without waiting for a response, he turned and began to walk away. Annie stole a glance back at Katniss and Jo, a question lingering in her eyes. _Are you guys okay with this?_

_No, no, and no._ But Katniss wasn’t about to voice that thought out loud. Instead she nodded, taking a deep breath to steady herself. 

“After you,” Jo pushed Annie forward, and they trudged on down the hall. 

“I’m Haymitch, their manager,” the middle aged man turned around and spoke after he stopped at a closed door. Taking a deep pull from the bottle, he wiped his mouth with the corner of his sleeve. Katniss grimaced, not even trying to hide her disgust. He smelled like he’d been drinking for a while. “I know you’re not up to any funny business, but what about you two?” He looked pointedly between Katniss and Jo. 

Jo laughed, the sound echoing off the walls in the narrow hallway. “You’re sick of Finnick running his mouth, and I’m tired of this one moping around because she misses him. You think getting her here was easy? I’m not leaving now just so she can chicken out an run away again.” Annie began to protest, but Jo cut her off, pointing at Katniss. “And she’s just an accomplice.” 

Katniss shrugged. She wasn’t wrong. 

Tilting his head, he squinted his eyes in the dim light- studying her. “You look kinda familiar.” 

“Ever been to Sae’s Bar? Maybe I’ve served you a time or two,” She cast a pointed look at the bottle in his hand.

Satisfied, Haymitch grunted. “Don’t touch anything,” he instructed, opening the door behind him into the side stage area. “Once their set is finished, they’ll come off this way and take you backstage.” 

The music was even louder as they made their way on to the side stage. Before she could cover her ears to lessen the noise, Haymitch shoved a plastic-wrapped package of ear plugs at her. Nodding in thanks, she tore them open, wasting no time in shoving the foam pieces into her ears. 

A guitar tech milled around several stands with spare guitars, waiting for his cue if necessary. Haymitch took a seat on a worn out couch against the back wall, and they stood at the edge of the stage, watching the band. 

Annie sighed, a smile stretching across her face as she watched Finnick from so close. He kept stealing glances at the side stage, his wide grin matching hers.

Finnick strummed wildly against his guitar strings, forcing out the rhythm as he rolled his body in time to the music. He chimed in at the chorus, echoing the lyrics in the background. The crowd went crazy, screaming and singing along at the top of their lungs, and Katniss couldn’t suppress the laugh that bubbled up. 

_Why isn’t he the frontman, again?_ The question was the automatic reaction to his complete and utter sex appeal, but she stopped cold. Her eyes were immediately drawn past Finnick towards the center stage, and she remembered why he wasn’t the frontman. 

Because they already had the perfect lead singer. 

Tall, handsome, and completely magnetic. 

Conflicting urges warred within her again; the desire to watch his every move battled with the need to run away and confront P immediately. 

_“Loverboy, you play those hearts like toys._  
_Don't you feel bad,_  
_ don't you feel bad,    
feel bad for them?”_

His words hit her like a punch to the stomach. Backing away slowly, she retreated into the darkness of the side stage and leaned against the wall. She pressed her eyes closed and took a deep breath, counting slowly to five as she released it. When she opened her eyes again, Jo was staring at her with a questioning look. 

“Too loud,” Katniss mouthed, pointing to her ears and making a pained face.

Nodding in understanding, Jo turned back around to face the stage again and slung her arm around Annie’s shoulders.

Out of the corner of her eye, Katniss saw Haymitch begin to chuckle from his spot on the threadbare couch. Digging the foam wedges out of her ears, she cast him a fierce glare. “Is something funny?” Although it was still loud, he didn’t have to shout for her to hear his response.

“You’re a shit liar, sweetheart.” 

She rolled her eyes and moved to the back corner, pulling out her phone to busy herself until the set was over. Just like she couldn’t stop looking at the man on center stage, Katniss couldn’t stop herself from pulling up her chat history with P. 

_June 21st, 4:06 PM: I was just walking by some shops and thought of you.... They had this hideous, ugly stuffed cat that reminded me of your stories of Buttercup. Be lucky I don’t have your address or you would be finding a very special gift in your mailbox next week._

It was all a lie. 

_April 7th, 2:38 AM: I’m always amazed that we can be so far apart but I still feel this close to you._

How could he do this? How could he lure her into sending a photo of herself and then pretend to be some rock star? Didn’t he realize she would have found out sooner or later? That kind of charade would never last.

_February 15th, 5:09 PM: I don’t care what you say, clearance Valentine’s chocolates are a perfectly acceptable dinner choice. Don’t even act like you wouldn’t be doing the same thing if you were here._

Why couldn’t he have let them continue on as they were? Everything had been just fine. But no, he’d had to go and turn her life upside down, making her imagine some sort of life with a man whose looks made her knees wobble and her core tight. 

_January 23rd, 9:04 AM: 182 days. That’s how many sunsets I’ve seen with you on my mind. Can you believe it’s only been six months?_

Instead, everything was over. No more late night chats. No more heartfelt confessions in the silence of her own room, the laptop or her phone as her lifeline to him. No more fantasies of tattoos and his teeth against her skin. No more imaging her hand was his, doing things she’d wished were possible between them. 

_January 1st, 1:12 AM: My New Year’s resolution? Find a way to make you smile every single day._

No more P. 

Katniss’ train of thought was broken by several high-pitched squeals, and she had to blink through the glaze of tears that had built up against her vision to be able to see what was going on. 

Three girls stood beside the door to the side stage, Haymitch grimacing as they jumped up and down in excitement. They were dressed to the nines, stilettos and skin-tight dresses wrapped around their perfect size two waists. Each had a shining gold VIP badge draped around their necks, and they were trying desperately to see past Haymitch and onto the stage. 

“Girls! You have to wait out here for just a few more minutes, they’re still finishing up their last couple of songs. Once they’re done, you can come in and have your meet-and-greet,” Haymitch held them off, blocking their view with an arm against the doorframe. 

The tallest one stood on the toes of her high heels, spying Katniss. Her beautiful features twisted into an ugly scowl. ”Why does she get to be back there, then? We didn’t pay _hundreds_ of dollars each for these passes to get stuck back here in a dark hallway.” She crossed her arms over her shoulder and huffed out a breath. 

“Sorry ladies, she and her friends are with the band. You’ll just have to wait your turn.” Haymitch had an odd note of patience in his voice.

Katniss raised her eyebrows in surprise. Must be the alcohol. 

It took a moment, but his words set in. _They’re still finishing up their last couple of songs._

_What?_ She was confused. Hadn’t they just started? They’d only been a few songs in when she had retreated to the back corner. Pressing the button on the side of her phone, the screen lit up. 

**9:47 PM**

The show had started at 8:30, but the security guard had brought them backstage around 9. Had she really been standing here, staring at her phone for 45 minutes? 

Jo turned, somehow hearing the noise from the girls over the sounds from the stage speakers. She pulled out her earplugs as she walked over, shoving them into her purse before joining Katniss in the corner. 

Before she could give her shit about spending the concert hiding in a corner, Katniss spoke up. “What’s with the show? It hasn’t even been an hour and a half yet.”

Jo snorted. “Right after we got back here, Finnick sent the signal that they’d be cutting the set short. Too eager to get laid, I’m guessing.”

Pressing her lips together, she hoped that Annie would be heading back to the tour bus or hotel with Finnick. Hearing them have sex through the thin walls of their apartment was not on her Top 5 list of things of things to do tonight.

“You doing okay?” Jo questioned, adjusting her position so that her shoulder was pressed against the wall and she was facing Katniss. 

Opening her mouth to respond, the words died against her tongue. What was she supposed to say? Anger warred with sadness and humiliation, the mixture of emotions burning a deep hole into her chest. She felt completely consumed with it all, but how was she supposed to explain it to Jo? Tonight was supposed to be about Annie. 

“Headache,” she forced out an excuse, settling for the easy answer. The lie tasted sour against her lips. “All this noise is turning it into a migraine.”

“You are looking pretty rough,” Jo smiled as Katniss glared at her. “Seriously though, if you aren’t feeling well, you can always go on home ahead of us. You can take my car and I’ll go with them to make sure Annie doesn’t get molested by the savage rock stars.” Her eyebrows quirked with her joke, but Katniss was too focused on her offer. 

Go home early? The thought was enough to instantly release the tension from her shoulders. Her body felt heavy all of the sudden, limbs weighed down by invisible emotions that seemed like they could pull her straight through the floor.“Thanks, Jo. That would be good.”

As Jo dug through her purse for her keys, the band geared up for their final song.

“You guys have been awesome tonight!” The cheers and shouts were loud even on the side stage, but the sound of _his_ voice, warmer and rougher from singing all night, cut through loud and clear. “We can’t thank you enough for coming out and finishing out our tour with a bang!” 

That same tightness from the beginning of the show began to grow inside her chest again, building up a pressure that made Katniss feel giddy and light-headed. She would pay good money just to listen to him talk. 

“Now, since you’ve all been so wonderful, we’re going to play one last song for you,” more cheers intermixed with applause bled into the side stage. Jo paused, and they both turned their heads towards the stage to listen in. “This one goes out to anybody in the crowd who’s ever had someone use you, abuse you, or treat you like trash because they wanted something from you.” 

“Damn, that’s kinda cold.” Jo held out her keyring, dropping it into Katniss’ open hand. “You should stay through this song at least and say hi to Finnick. I know Annie wants us to meet him.” Her smile was sympathetic.

“Okay, but I think I’m going to stay back here,” Knowing that she wouldn’t be able to look away if she went by the stage again, she compromised. With a nod, Jo made her way back over to Annie, who was dancing around to the music. 

_“I've been trying to make sense_  
_I've been shouting under my breath_  
_How's any of this in my interest?_  
_When you sold me out, I must've not got the check_  
_Your lust is a lie, but it comes as no surprise_  
_Time after time, it goes right past the line_  
_I do my best to, to make amends with you_  
_But I just can't see the end, oh”_

Eyes closed Katniss listened in to the lyrics, soaking in the sound of his voice, imagining they were the only two people in the room. Finnick chimed in at the chorus, but it barely registered. 

_“And isn't it funny how_  
_Those black clouds follow you around?_  
_It's Karma smiling down_  
_Just let me know when it's in town_  
_You act like the world owes you a favor_  
_You want it all but you don't like the taste, oh_  
_You've been throwing bricks at my window_  
_Like there's no better way to say 'Hello'_  
_Hello...”_

Finnick echoed the chorus once more, his voice mixing in easily with the verses. When the next set of lyrics came in, Katniss sucked in a breath, the air burning at her lungs. He was speaking more than singing, his voice deeper and more determined. It felt incredibly intimate, like he was whispering only to her. Without a doubt, the sound would echo into her dreams tonight whether she wanted it to or not.

_“I'm the devil on your shoulder_  
_I'm the conscious in your mind_  
_I'm the feeling that you, you cannot hide_  
_I'm the devil on your shoulder_  
_Telling you that love is blind_  
_It's OK when, it's hiding in disguise_

 _Your loose lips let, let words slide_  
_You spend too much time talking about my life_  
_Stories you will spin just for a power trip_  
_It's safe to say that I am not into it_

 _In the picture you were not_  
_Someone's in your spot_  
_This is the result of people moving on_

 _Good luck with killing time_  
_You won't be killing mine_  
_I'll do my best_  
_To always be on your mind..._  
_Your mind...”_

Finnick joined back in for the end of the song, chanting the chorus back and forth with the audience as they finished their set. The crowd roared, clapping and chanting and cheering as the band finished up. Katniss could only imagine them bowing to the crowd, soaking in the admiration. “We love you Panem!” With a final goodbye, the stage lights went dark. 

Footsteps pounded against the wooden surface of the stage, and Katniss could feel her throat closing shut. As long as the stage lights stayed off and the dim blue bulb was the only thing lighting the area, she would be safe in the corner. No one would be able to see her. 

“Annie!” Finnick didn’t waste time removing his guitar crashing against her, barely taking the time to swing it across his back before their arms were tangled together. 

“Finn!” Annie jumped at him, pressing her lips tightly against his. “I’m so sorry,” Katniss could her hear mumbling in between frantic kisses. 

The rest of the guys passed them, laughing and clapping Finnick on the back before making their way over towards the couch. Looking around, she felt completely trapped. She’d waited too long. If she ran now, they would all see her. They were getting closer with each step, still too focused on congratulating one another on a good show to realize she was there. 

He was only a few feet away now, and _dear god_ he looked magnificent. Too busy to notice he was being watched, Katniss felt rooted to the spot. Realizing she couldn’t go anywhere just yet, she gave in to the desire to linger for a little while longer and relaxed against the wall. 

Tight jeans molded to his thighs, leaving little to the imagination. His hair was damp with sweat, darkening it from light blonde to ash, but he tamed the unruly waves with a comb of his fingers. Laughing at something his bandmate said, he threw his head back and placed an arm against the opposite wall, steadying himself. Arms corded with muscle and abs rippling underneath the bottom edge of his shirt, she had to actively resist the pull to move towards him. She wanted to burrow her nose into the crook of his neck and memorize his taste-

Katniss’ appraisal was cut off, her attention broken by the high-pitched squeals of the VIP girls that Haymitch had finally let through. Teetering on their stilettos, the three ran forward and rushed the members of the band. “Ohmigod! It was such a good show!” “I love you guys!” “Will you sign my chest?!” 

They all grappled for the attention, shoving their breasts up as high as they could and batting their eyelashes excessively. Katniss snorted in derision, but they’d provided a good distraction. All of the guys were currently backed into the wall, signing autographs and taking selfies with the girls. They all looked cozy together, pressing their faces together for smiling photographs and chummy laughs. 

Tucking her hair behind her ear, Katniss silently counted to three and took a quiet step forward. Keeping her eyes down, she crept carefully towards the door, praying that she wouldn’t be seen. 

“Leaving so soon, sweetheart?” Haymitch called out from his place back on the couch, arms crossed and a wry smile on his face. 

She halted, cursing to herself. Somehow his voice carried, and now that there was no more music blaring from the stage, the statement had sounded like a shout in the small area. 

_Please be busy, please don’t look over here, please please please…_

If she hadn’t known better, she could have sworn that her feet had suddenly turned into cement. Risking a glance, Katniss peeked over her shoulder and froze. 

He was looking at her.

Sharpie poised in his fingertips and a poster in the other hand ready to sign, he was squinting through the dim blue light at her. Confusion shaded his face, his eyebrows furrowed together and a frown playing at the corners of his lips. He opened his mouth, words dancing at the tip of his tongue, but nothing came out. 

_Fuck._

He leaned forward, trying to get a better look, but Katniss took a step back, her mouth gone instantly dry. She held her breath, holding the air in her lungs as if it might help her to disappear. The only thing she could hear was her own heartbeat, the sound of blood rushing and pumping in her ears. Beating so hard she felt the pulse in her fingertips, she knew what she had to do.

Run. 

Without wasting any time she bolted from the room, throwing open the stage door and sprinting down the narrow hallway. _Thank god I wore flats._

Bursting through the door to the main area of the club, concert goers still hung around, hoping for an encore and shooting her strange looks. She ignored them and pushed towards the entrance that they had come through, hoping that she could get to the car without anyone stopping her. 

“I’m going to be sick,” she gasped out at a group of guys who wouldn’t budge, immediately jumping back at her words. She barreled past them without a “thank you,” desperate to get as far away as possible. 

Breaking through the front doors, Katniss sprinted towards the parking lot a few blocks away where they’d left Jo’s car. She gulped down air, trying to suck in enough oxygen to calm the adrenaline that was raging through her system. Once she reached Jo’s blue SUV, she collapsed on the hood. 

Her chest was heaving, limbs shaking, fingers numb. More tears began to sting at the corners of her eyes, but anger flooded through her body like a fresh wave, revitalizing her.

Pulling out her phone, she began punching words into her chat with P, not wasting any time. 

_K.everest: did you really think you could lie to me and I wouldn’t find out sooner or later?_

_K.everest: I can’t believe that you would send me some fake photo of a rock singer- you must be really pathetic to hide behind some catfish scheme_

_K.everest: I never want to fucking speak to you again_

Her hands trembled as she bit her lip, finally allowing the tears to fall onto her cheeks. Reaching her fingers up to the chat controls, she deleted the conversation. 

Then, opening up another control window, she typed his screen name into the “Blocked Senders” list. 

Finger hovering over the touchscreen, she took a deep breath and angrily wiped the tears away. This was what she needed to do.

Closing her eyes, she pressed the SUBMIT button. 

 

Everything in the apartment was quiet and still- a strange feeling against the emotions that were warring inside of Katniss’ head. She sighed into the darkness, shrugging off her purse by the front door before walking towards her bedroom.

Not bothering to turn on any lights, she kicked off her shoes and pulled her dress over her head and collapsed face-down on the bed, intent to pass out and end this horrible night.

Instead of finding sleep when she closed her eyes, all she could see was his face.

His bright smile, eyes crinkled at the corners and a sheen of sweat on his forehead in the bright stage lights. 

His tongue, darting out to wet his lips before speaking into the microphone. 

His hands, the strong fingers reaching up to push his messy waves away from his eyes. 

_Fuck._

With a groan, Katniss rolled over and rubbed her face. This wasn’t going to work. 

Padding through her doorway and into the shared bathroom, she turned on the light before opening the medicine cabinet. After a moment of sorting through the orange plastic bottles, she found what she was looking for. 

Morphling. 

Leftover from when she’d dislocated her shoulder, there were still two pills left. She didn’t need them to dull any physical pain- she needed to be completely and utterly dead to the world.

 

 

_Everything was hazy. Like a film, the view of the space before her was flickering and out of focus. Katniss squinted, but there was nothing to see except dark walls and a threadbare couch by the side door. Everything was cast in a blue shadow, and the echo of music filled her ears. The sound was loud and pulsing- the harsh sounds of the guitar and pounding beat of the drums vibrating through her body and resonating in her chest. Light filtered through the space between heavy velvet curtains to her right, and she knew where she was._

_She was backstage._

_Alone._

_Before she could walk towards the stage, the music dwindled into nothing, cheers and shouts taking its place. Heavy footsteps pounded against the floor as the lights dimmed and the guys ran off stage, laughing and joking with each other as they congratulated themselves on a job well done._

_Suddenly their voices died off, and all she could hear was her own nervous breathing._

_“Katniss?”_

_P was standing in front of her then, his hands reaching up to cradle her face. She leaned into his touch, the roughness of his fingertips feeling perfect against her skin. His eyes roamed her features, settling on her lips. He wetted his own, but paused._

_“God, you’re so…” He paused, crushing his lips against her own. The kiss was hard, her surprise punctuated with a sharp inhale. “Perfect.” Taking a step forward, he pushed his body against hers, trailing kisses across her cheeck, along her jaw, and down her neck._

_“I’ve waited so long for you, Katniss,” he whispered, softly sucking and nibbling the sensitive skin._

_She gasped, a breathy moan escaping her lips as she tilted her head back to give him better access. Reaching for him, her fingers grabbed at his shirt, pulling her hips tighter against her own. She felt his erection pressing against her stomach, hot and hard even though the thick denim of his jeans. The feel of it sent a flash of warmth through her core, and she rocked her hips against him._

_“Please,” she whispered, “I need you. I need this to be real.”_

_He lifted his head, his blue eyes sparkling as he took in her features. “This is real, I swear it.”_

_Stepping back away from her body, she felt a sudden loss of warmth as he took her hand and began walking towards the other side of the room._

_“I need you closer,” he answered her unspoken question, leading her to the couch. Sitting down, he gazed up at her, a smile playing against his lips. “Come here.”_

_Tugging lightly at her hands, he placed a kiss to the inside of each wrist. The feel of his lips against the sensitive skin sent a ripple of goosebumps up her arms. With a shuddered breath she lowered her body down, straddling his hips. She could still feel his erection, the hardness pressing up against the apex of her thighs, sending little frissons of want coursing through her veins. Her dress had ridden up over her legs, the extra fabric gathering loosely around her hips. She’d probably already left a wet spot on the thin material of her panties, but she couldn’t bring herself to care._

_P was here, in front of her. With her._

_Suddenly impatient, she shifted her hips and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling his lips back to hers. He groaned at the friction and placed his hands against her hips, his fingers playing at the edge of her dress. Taking the lead, P deepened the kiss, running his tongue along the seam of her lips until she opened for him. Exploring her mouth, he trailed his hand up her back and buried it in her hair. He ran his fingers across her scalp before fisting her hair lightly and pulling her head back, nipping her bottom lip between his teeth._

_The gentle tug sent a fresh wave of arousal through her core, the desire so strong she was beginning to ache. Desperate for something more, she began to rock her hips, whimpering at the roughness of his jeans and the friction against her clit. He groaned in response, the sound vibrating through his chest as she worked herself on top of him._

_Breaking the kiss and leaning his forehead against hers, P spoke softly. “Tell me what you want, Katniss.” With one hand still on her hips, he rocked up against her, increasing the force of her thrusts. The other hand pulled at her hair and her eyes fluttered shut- she was completely at his mercy._

_“You,” she swallowed, but her throat was suddenly too dry. “I want you.”_

_Smiling at her words, his hand crept over to her center, brushing lightly against the fabric of her panties. After a moment of teasing he pulled open the waistband and delved inside, sliding a finger between her folds._

_With a groan, he took her lips again. “So wet for me already?”_

_She barely managed to nod, only able to focus on the leisurely drag of his fingers. He chuckled in response before slipping a thick finger inside her, pumping in and out at the same slow pace._

_“Oh god,” her jaw dropped open and she leaned forward, putting more pressure against his hand. “More.”_

_Rocking her hips, she rode his hand shamelessly. He gave in to her plea and inserted a second finger before capturing her lips in a passionate kiss, their tongues dancing together. When his thumb found her clit, she cried out against his lips, breaking the kiss and falling forward on to his body._

_“That’s it, baby,” he whispered into her ear, his hips thrusting lightly beneath her. “Ride it out, take what you need…”_

_Katniss inhaled, taking in his scent as she moved on top of his body. He smelled like fresh dill and the light undercurrent of sweat, the musky aroma of his cologne mixing in together into a heady combination._

_P increased the speed and pressure of his thumb, circling around her clit as his fingers pumped in time. Pressure began to grow in her pelvis as she rocked against him, and she knew she wouldn’t last long. Bearing down, she tightened her legs against his hips. “Don’t stop,” she whispered against his neck, peppering kisses against his pulse point._

_The tightness was growing rapidly, the pleasure building and building until, with a curl of his fingers inside her, Katniss was pushed over the edge. P grabbed the back of her head and crushed his lips against hers, swallowing the cry as she began to orgasm._

_Pleasure exploded through her center, white hot and intense as it flooded her senses. She couldn’t see, she couldn’t hear, she could only feel as the endorphins rushed through her system. Everything except P ceased to exist- the feel of his fingers as he massaged the sensitive ridges inside her walls, the smell of him as he pressed her chest against his own, his teeth as he sucked her bottom lip into his mouth as she rode out her orgasm._

_Finally, after several long moments, she came down from her cloud of euphoria._

_“I need to know your name,” she whispered against his mouth, kissing him softly._

_“It’s Pe-“_

Katniss’ eyes shot open and she bolted upright, hands clawing at the sheets of her bed as her heart raced. Adrenaline was coursing through her veins and her entire body felt shaky and clammy, like she’d slept off a fever. 

But there was nothing to greet her except her dark, empty apartment. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you all think! 
> 
> If you wanna stop by tumblr and say hi, I'm @ambpersand :)

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed everything, and please please please send me a message with your thoughts! You can find me on tumblr @ambpersand.


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